A couple of weeks ago the Austin Chronicle came out with its annual Restaurant Poll (For anyone reading this who does not live in Austin, the Chronicle is our free liberal weekly, like the Press in Houston, the Voice in NY, the Scene in Nashvile...and numerous other rags in a city near you).

The poll is divided into two categories, the Readers Poll and the Critics Poll. Needless to say I take the Readers Poll with a grain of skepticism. An example is the "Best Coffee" category. For years the winner has been Starbucks. In a town with good local coffee roasters and locally owned coffee shops, Starbucks takes the prize. This is an absurd enough reality that it makes the Poll in many ways a laughingstock. This year, Starbucks lost its first prize slot to another unworthy winner, Austin Java. Although I admire Austin Java's success as a restaurant company, I do not consider them a serious contender for award-winning coffee. Up until the last few years, they did not even roast their own coffee but had it roasted for them. I am glad that the Chronicle readers are now wise enough to finally realize that a local company should receive this prize instead of it going to Big Green. However, anybody who knows anything about coffee in Austin knows that the enthusiast destinations are JP's Java and Cafe Medici, and that they are many lengths ahead of any other competition.

My amateur analysis suggests that most people who answer the Readers Poll fill in every blank (perhaps the only instance when I think the democratic principle of the cherished right to vote might be misapplied...) regardless of what they know about the category. I, for one, do not know where to get the best dish of Pho in Austin, so I don't fill in that line. But I can only imagine that many readers see a category such as "coffee" and put the first thing that comes to mind: Starbucks, or in the case of this year, Austin Java. The other obvious problem with the Poll is shilling and ballot-stuffing. A popular restaurant with command of its database can greatly skew the results. An example this year is Plucker's Wing Bar, which won in the category of "Best Chicken Dish." It is obnoxious that a wing joint would take the prize in this category. Pluckers, however, has a fan base that is devoted and motivated, and easily mobilized by the regular emails sent to Plucker's Club members--I know because I am one of those members (who did not, incidentally, give them my vote for Best Chicken Dish). It is unfortunate that such shenanigans can cause a more deserving winner to be dethroned, but at the same time it is refreshing that this type of prank can still be pulled off in Austin. Perhaps we are not yet Dallas after all. (Also, there is no category for best wings)

As much as this delegitimizes the Poll, every year when the Poll comes out Austinites, myself included, snatch it up to check out the year's winners. There were a few categories this year that had to do with cocktails or beverages, and I was generally pleased with the results in those categories.

Critics Poll responses:
Best Creative Cocktails--Ben Craven at Starlite
Incredibly Creative Martinis--Imperia
Best Paradise for Single Malt Lovers--Opal Divine's (Agreed)
Best Michelada--who cares
Readers Poll responses:
Best Mixologist --Bill Norris at FINO
Beer Selection--The Ginger Man (Agreed)

Last night I finally had the opportunity to sample, in one evening, the top categories. Tipsy and I headed to FINO to meet Mindy Kucan, another award-winning local mixologist, and Rob from 42 Below vodka. Bill Norris, as it happens, was not there. Clinton was there instead, and he mixed up a few faithful interpretations of Bill's drinks. What I like about Bill's menu is that he has a mix of his own creations as well as select classic cocktails. I feel like the craft mixologist has the responsibility not just to create innovative new preparations, but also to participate in the education of the public with regards to classical mixology. Bill is studied in the classical cocktail cannon, but is also making his own bitters, syrups, and infusions.

After FINO we went to Starlite, where the chief mixologist was also not present. Standing in for him was Zach, who shook up a handful of Ben Craven's creations for us. Ben has been taking advantage of the willingness of Starlite chef Josh Hines to produce house-made syrups and other concoctions for use behind the bar. Starlite has an outstanding selection of spirits, certainly one of the best in town. Trying to decide between Ben, who won the critics poll for creative cocktails, and Bill, who won the readers poll for Best Mixologist, is like splitting hairs. They are both talented and among the only barkeeps in Austin whom I entrust with making me a drink I know I will like.

From Starlite we proceeded to Imperia. I have to say that we went there with great hesitation. In fact, I was certain that my review of this establishment was going to be hateful, as if we went there just for ironic effect. However, I was completely proven wrong. (I should confess that the reasons I thought I was going to hate Imperia were completely unreasonable: I was mad that Capitol Brasserie was no longer there; I once attempted to get drinks there but bumped in to a douchebag restaurant owner that I know who told me it was his favorite hangout, which led me to believe that it was too douchey for me to stay at; and because a quick glance at the drinks menu revealed a bunch of vodka-based drinks.)

It was therefore with great amusement that I read in the Chronicle poll that Imperia was getting an award for "Incredibly Creative Martinis." For one thing, "creative" and "martini" are words that I never want to hear in the same sentence. I want a traditional martini, a classic martini, not a creative one. Is it too much to ask that the Chronicle refer to them as Cocktails, not Martinis? Is it too much to ask that the culinary guardians that officiate the critics poll not succumb to the temptation to categorize everything that comes in a conical glass as a "martini."
The Critics Poll is, after all, then Senate to the Readers Poll's House--the upper hand, the staid authority against the rambunctious populace.

Well, after we sat down at Imperia, my initial trepidation was assuaged. The hospitality from the manager CK and the bartender Tandy was great, especially for a slow Monday night, when service often suffers. We tasted our way through the entire cocktail menu (I will not call it a Martini menu) and there were quite a few nice surprises. Even the menu was, true to my memory, a bit vodka-centric for my taste, they were far from insipid. The Critics may have been too liberal in their use of the label "martini", but they were correct to give praise to this establishment.